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By Tuff Harris
What makes you nervous to think about? In other words, what gives you butterflies? For me, it’s public speaking, asking for help or explaining myself in front of people. This process use to torture me! In school, it was the speech I had to give in front of the class. In leadership, it was the talk I was asked to give to some younger students. In relationships, it was the girl that I wanted to ask out. In my job, it was the sermon I had to deliver or the motivational speech I was asked to give. In life, it was the help I needed from someone I had to ask. All of these things had the same dreadful feelings of butterflies in my stomach that made me sick; not to mention the sleepless nights, the outburst of anger from stress and the deep feeling of pain that led to procrastination.
Another example was trying something new, like changing my style of clothing. It went something like this: I would go to the department store to try on a few things and thought, “I look good in this and love this style”. I even managed to talk myself into buying that item even if it was a little bit expensive. I knew it would be worth it because of how good I felt in it. And then the morning came when I tried it on and the butterflies showed up. All those feelings of loving how it looked suddenly left. I’d tell myself, “I can’t wear this, it’s not me, it’s out of character, it will be noticed by everyone that I’m trying to look and feel good. I’ll have to explain myself to people”. So what did I do? I decided I’d only wear it for special occasions, but it never left my closet. Other times I took it right back to the store where I bought it or gave it to someone else who would wear it.
I used to let the butterflies keep me from living. I would talk to the same people, wear the same clothes and rarely accept an invitation to speak in front of people in any way. I would also rarely try anything that would require me to put myself out there, the real me! The fear and dread of “what will they think” kept me from living the life I wanted. The reality is that people don’t really care about these things, at least not these things about you. If you are confident in all these areas people will only love you for them. Ok, maybe some will be jealous and mean but it doesn’t matter. If you are not confident people have this broken tendency to try to help you by pointing it out or making fun of it.
So how do we get confidence? You have to chase the butterflies!
Here’s how:
First, recognize that the butterflies are there to serve a purpose. The purpose is not to keep you from danger or pain rather they are there to give you something. When you press into these feelings you will start the ignition to getting the life you want to live. The things that make us most nervous in life have the greatest rewards if you choose to walk in that direction. Whatever is common or easy rarely gives us satisfaction and accomplishment. The payoff is on the other side of the butterflies.
Second, verbalize everything you are feeling, first to yourself and then to a person you trust. If you don’t get the truth of how you feel out it can cause negative symptoms later. Some of these symptoms are anger, denial, procrastination, or creative excuses. We can tap into our creative bank to come up with every excuse as to why we should not follow through on our original agreement to get what we want. By verbalizing our feelings we lower stress and we are able to continue on the path to completion.
Third, visualize the best version of yourself and how you want it to play out. Before a football game I used to visualize how I was going to play the game. Every catch and every tackle was thought through before I stepped onto the field. What really accelerated the result I wanted was to visualize how I was going to respond when it didn’t go the way I wanted. I would visualize what I would do if I dropped the catch or missed the tackle. This helped me respond powerfully by developing my character when things didn’t go my way. Part of the visualization process is verbalizing positive phrases when things are getting stressful. You need to predetermine what phrase will help you through the pain. Referring to the stress I would repeat “You want this!” And when the actual moment came, I would repeat the phrase that I said many times before. Sometimes the phrase can be a single word like “courage” or “power”! Trust me, it works. Its better to visualize and say simple phrases then to get stuck in the alternative (anger, denial, procrastination, etc.).
Lastly, practice! It doesn’t rhyme with visualize or verbalize but it is vital to getting what you actually want. Find every area of your life that you want something different or something more. Change is hard but you want it. We don’t want to get stuck in clothes fashion that has been left behind decades ago. You don’t want to live with regret because you never tried. You don’t want miss out on life because the butterflies kept you from the most exciting, adventurous and best version of yourself.
Make the commitment today to stop talking yourself out of things and start talking yourself into things. When you choose to go places and do things that confront your fears you inspire all the onlookers. Tell the scaredy cat version of you that things are going to change because you are now chasing butterflies and slaying dragons!
-Tuff Harris | Executive Director

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by Serena Nalani Nakanaiʻaekuʻiikaleināki Michel
Hoʻi ka ʻoʻopu ʻai lehua i ka māpunapuna.
The lehua-eating ʻoʻopu has gone back to the spring.
Said of one who has gone back to the source.
—ʻŌlelo Noʻeau (Hawaiian saying) #1034
ʻOʻopu nākea are very special fish in our home of Hawaiʻi. They lay their eggs in mountain stream beds, and once hatched, the larvae are swept down to the ocean with the surges of freshwater due to heavy rains. After spending a few months at sea, the young ʻoʻopu migrate back upstream toward the mountain to spend the rest of their adult lives. ʻOʻopu are known for their ability to make this journey upstream, using their strong suction cup mouths to cling to rocks. “ʻOʻopu ʻai lehua” is a “poetic description of ʻoʻopu found in upland streams where lehua flowers drop into the water” (manomano.io). ʻOʻopu always return back to the springs from which they hatched.

At the beginning of 2019, a year before I came to One Heart, I spent two weeks grieving over the possibility of being pregnant by a young man who did not love for me. I remember the pounding in my chest and the nausea in my stomach going to buy a pregnancy test and hiding from my parents, who are senior pastors of our church. I was so scared. I had no vision for my life at that point, and my thought was, “Well, I have no plan, so I guess this is going to be my new reality.” I was so indifferent that I did not care, and I was full of shame. I could not look at anybody in their eyes for those two weeks.
By the grace of God, I was not pregnant.
A month later, I met our partners with One Heart, Pastors Yaseer and Monique Handall of Arise Ministries, who took me in and discipled me, beginning the transformation of my life that would flourish in One Heart under Tuff and Mary Harris at the beginning of this year. Today, I am not only free from the bondage of shame, but I also have grown in my ability to take my lustful thoughts captive and give them in obedience to the Lord. I continue to daily be transformed by the renewal of my mind in His Word.
As I write this post, I am sitting in my house with a beautiful view of our mountains at the back of the verdant valley of Mānoa, lush with various shades of green, heavy with humidity due to the rain that always passes through it, and the harmonies of birdsong all around. I have not returned here for almost a year, and it is surreal to be in this place again at the end of an intense and unexpected year.

I decided one day to go on a walk through Mānoa. I planned for it to be short, but the Holy Spirit kept telling me to keep going in a direction that was leading to my former college, the University of Hawaiʻi at Mānoa, which resides at the beginning of the valley. I wondered where the Spirit was leading me, and all of a sudden, I saw a vision of the head source of water that feeds the taro patches at a place on the university’s campus called Ka Papa Loʻi o Kānewai (Ka Pa-pa Lō-ee oh Kah-neh-vaee). This place is where I met the young man who could have been the father of our child; the source of where it all began. I knew the Lord wanted me to make the journey there to restore that space and redeem it for Him.
When I reached the entrance to the taro patches, I noticed that there was a hala, or pandanus, tree. The word hala in ʻŌlelo Hawaiʻi (the Hawaiian language) is used for the word “sin,” and the tree, specifically its fruit that is used to make lei (wreaths for the neck or head), symbolically marks transitions in life where there is a death of something and a passage into a new thing. This cultural aspect is why such lei are only given at graduations and funerals. I knew the Lord was telling me that what would take place there between us would mark the death of my former life before truly following Him, certainly including the unhealthy, sexual relationship with that young man, and the new life into which I have transitioned.
As I passed through the taro patches and made my journey upstream, I felt the weight of my former sins committed in the dorms which border the stream. My feet clung to the rocks along the path as I stepped over them so as not to fall. I, too, noticed the lāʻī (ti leaves) that lined the path, a symbol of protection in Hawaiian culture, and for me, especially in that moment, the presence of my Protector with me. When I reached the poʻowai (head source of water), I sat on one of the rocks gently and let my tears flow like the stream. I prayed to the Lord, confessed my sins that I had committed, asked Him for forgiveness, and with the authority He has given me, declared the space as one redeemed for His glory. When I finished praying, I felt the weight on my heart lifted and the sun’s rays shined brighter through the trees as the clouds moved above. And then I made the journey back to my home at the base of the mountains of Mānoa.

Like the ʻoʻopu nākea, I physically went upstream back to the source—the source of where my sin began, and now the new source of God’s redemption. Spiritually, however, I went back upstream to the life-giving spring of God’s unconditional love, grace, and forgiveness, and I intend to remain here for the rest of my life.
What sources do you need to return to for the redemption and healing of our amazing, beautiful Father? They can be physical spaces and/or spiritual places in your heart, mind, and soul. This year has definitely had its challenges and tragedies. But because of our Father’s great Love, we are not consumed. His steadfast Love never ceases, His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning. Great is His faithfulness! (Lamentations 3:22–23). I redeem this year in Jesus’s Name for you who read this. AMEN.

To those who this will move into action it has been given to you this letter of hope. I write from all parts of my being (mind, soul, spirit, and body), for all have been affected. I have been given a burden from the Lord that has consumed the majority of my thoughts and prayers. Many things inspire me to do, what many may consider, impossible. My life has been an amazing journey with the Lord and I can’t wait for the next step. Many events in my life that have come to pass have once been deemed impossible by many people in my world. I have seen things that have put me on a path with no return and I desire to see that which is, by human standards, impossible. My belief is that you are a major player in this vision and vital to the success of this mission.
This letter is intended to stir your heart to consider a place at the table of conspiracy. At this table, we conspire together to do great things through God. You are needed. This table is not without commitment and the content of the discussion should not be taken lightly. Many of us are called to very specific tasks to help build the Body of Christ. This may look very different to everyone. Some are given leadership, some the ability to follow, some many talents, others extraordinary creativity that is conjured up in the mind, and many the ability to support others. Some have an incredible ability to bring a profound perspective with a simplistic understanding. Some joy with laughter that is contagious. Few have the financial means to fund an entire operation of this magnitude but all have monetary value through some kind of support. You have been invited to the table.
I don’t know how to start a revolution, but I would imagine that it starts with the right information. Including: the players, the field of battle, the opponent, the strengths, the weaknesses, the goal, the warnings, the strategies, and the PLAN! Not everything is set in place or is even known to me. This is why this letter is being written to you. You are a major part of this scheme and it only increases with your support. You have specific qualities and gifts that are needed to bring hope for victory. Your heart has been prepared, your understanding grows with application, and your faith builds with action. If you think you are ready the next question should be the right one: What is the Mission?
I’ve been giving a specific mission and it’s a call for all hands on deck, all points bulletin, or every available person who is willing is needed. Let me start with the timeline of this revelation. I have spent the last 5 years (2007-2011) chasing my childhood dream of playing professional football. It has taken me all over the country. It has had many challenges as well as many blessings. The people and relationships that the Lord placed in our path have impacted me and my wife in the most profound way. To say they are a life changing blessing is just the start of my appreciation for those people. This letter is written to many of those people. This past year (2011) has been challenging and incredibly blessed. We started the year off with the Steelers who made their way to the Super Bowl and finished with the Edmonton Eskimos in Canada. The revelation that the Lord has shown me started when I returned from Canada in late October. When I returned I committed to working out, reading, learning, and praying for extended periods of the day. Much of my time was spent seeking the Lord for my next step in my life if football was over. During this time I was approached with several job opportunities but I respectfully declined to pursue what the Lord would have for me to do. Every opportunity seemed to get bigger and better. The carrot dangling in front of my vision was very enticing. I decided to stick with the original plan.
Several weeks had gone by and I was enjoying my time in books, the Bible, and the freedom and flexibility of learning something new when I wanted to. My routine was breakfast, coffee, Bible, books, learn something new, workout, friends and functions. My time was filled with productive things. One morning as my wife, Mary, was heading to work I was about to get into my routine. I was staring at my French press and getting my breakfast ready for the start of the morning. An urge to fast breakfast came over me and I decided not to eat until after noon. I went to my usual study desk which happens to be our dining room table which happens to be in the living room. We lived in a small apartment; we loved it and made it work. As soon as I sat down at the table I began to receive things from the Lord that were new to me. Some of the things were new and some things were renewed from a past thought. I began to write down as much as I could but I couldn’t explain some of the things that I was receiving in writing so I started drawing what I was seeing. This started to make more sense to me so I continued to draw. Again I couldn’t fully explain what I was seeing through pictures, so I began to physically act them out. I would literally stand up and act out what the Lord was giving me and it was very clear to me what it was. There was a point when acting it out was not enough to get it out. The way I explain it to people is that there is an easy pressure in my chest in a very specific spot that I feel when I get these things. So in order to get this feeling to ease I opened my mouth and just started speaking everything that was in me. What came out was amazing to my ears. I turned my attention to the empty couch and started talking as if the entire couch was full of people. I felt like the audience was charged and excited to hear the message that was coming out of my mouth. Again nobody was on the couch, but the presence of people on the couch was charging me up. I lost track of time but I think it was over an hour of these wonderful words bubbling up out of me. When Mary got home I tried to tell her everything that the Lord was giving me. She responded with a look saying “you are crazy” and she proceeded to take a nap. In her defense she woke up at 4:30 am that morning.
During this period of time my heart was breaking for the Native American people. I grew up on the Crow Indian reservation in southeastern Montana. Growing up on the reservation was a very difficult thing for me to do. The reason it was so difficult for me is because I am only half Native American and my other half is mixed with other nationalities. My native half is ¼ Crow and ¼ Cheyenne. This is interesting because historically they were warring tribes. Grandpa Harris crossed the border and met Grandma Yellowtail and had father Harris who crossed the reservation border and met Momma Caton who together had me. It may seem like an unlikely story but for me it created much difficulty in my childhood. I struggled to fit in with anyone. Our family moved around a lot and I went to several different schools. Some of the schools were on the reservation and some were not. When I attended the white schools the kids called me, “Indian kid.” When I went to the reservation schools kids called me, “white boy.” If I was at a Crow school they would call me, “Cheyenne” and at a Cheyenne school, “Crow.” All I was trying to do was fit in with the kids so I felt normal. This actually led me to sin when I really didn’t want to do those things because of my faith in Christ. When I would do something I knew I wasn’t supposed to, it caused me great sorrow in my soul and I would cry out to the Lord to help me. By reservation standards I was pretty clean, but I knew by God’s standards I was filthy. The Lord would eventually reveal to me why He created me this way.
What the Lord was showing me had to do with the unity of the Body of Christ, this was exciting me. He was also showing me a place of health for the Native American people, specifically the men of the tribes. It was a picture of the United States and a lot of the major tribe’s names in their geographic location. For example, the Seminole are located in south Florida, the Crow are in Southeastern Montana and the Navajo span corners of three states in the southwest, etc. One place stood out above the rest. In the vision the Lord was giving me, this location had a large facility or building that could house many people. This place was healthy and flourishing with people who were building these men up. It was located in South Dakota, distinctively the Pine Ridge reservation. What I saw was arrows flying in towards this place and landing or hitting this facility. I knew what the arrows represented. They were the men of these tribes who come from a long line of strong warriors. These arrows were small and not threatening. As they hit, they would stay for a time and then they would fly back out to the tribes they came from. Only this time they were large and very healthy and when they hit the ground it caused a fire to spread. This gave me a surge of energy.
Over the next few weeks the Lord would continue to give me similar experiences. I would share them with people as the Lord directed me to and it would often give people the same charge I received. This was very encouraging to me and made me want to recruit for this fight. I could see the hunger in men’s eyes.
How do we start this revolution? We need the true information to guide us. Every good cause has had the right information. David knew who he was in God and defeated many a foe because he had the truth. He looked Goliath in the face and said you defile my God and cut the head off that filthy giant. Moses saw the abuse of his people and the Lord told him to do something and he did. Moses led the children of Israel out of bondage and slavery. President Lincoln knew who the enemy was and it wasn’t people. That is what allowed him to press on into a war with such human casualty. His efforts lead him to death. Martin Luther King Jr. knew his vision and followed it. His work still gives many freedom today. He also lost his life during this charge. I am not asking anyone to lay down their life, although that may be for some. I’m asking for you to get involved with the work of the Lord. We (the Body) are the hands and feet of Christ. One part of the body is not more or less important than the other. You have everything you need to succeed. Jesus finished it on the cross and all we need to do is carry that message to the broken.
So what is the information and who is involved. The people in need are Native Americans. The battle field is within the borders of the Reservations. I believe the starting point is Native Communities and reservations. The opponent is the same darkness that deceives men to kill, steal, and destroy. Our strength is us. Every willing person who pulls their chair up to the table will make an immeasurable difference. Our weakness is us. If we do nothing, our result will be the same. Our goal is simple; we will use every resource to free people from the bondages of satan and give them the truth of their real identity. They are a people who do not know their identity and are wandering. Our great country has been apart and even directly caused some of this great atrocity but we can do something to free natives to fulfill their purpose. The warning is that many have tried and many have failed. This is not for the casual spectator. You must find within yourself a desire to see others come to a freedom that you know. You must care. The strategy is going to come. I have been given a limited amount of the strategy but you are vital in the application of your support. You are the plan! I can’t do this by myself but I will try if I have to. The Pine Ridge reservation is probably the most affected by satan’s grip.
The statistics are staggering on the Pine Ridge reservation:
– Unemployment 80-85%
– 97% live below the poverty level
– Average life expectancy 48 (men) 52 (women), National average 78
-teen age suicide rates are 150% higher than Nat’l average
-infant mortality rate is 300% higher than Nat’l average, Highest on continent
-Diabetes are 800% higher than Nat’l average
-tuberculosis rate is 800% higher than Nat’l average
-Cervical cancer is 500% higher than Nat’l average
-reports say 60% of homes are infested with Black mold and Stachybotrus.
-Black mold and Stachybotrus cause many fatal and painful illnesses
-Federal Commodity Food Program supplies much of the food that the people eat
-the FCFP’s food is extremely high in salt, carbohydrates, sugar and fat
-preventative health programs are very rare
-treaties with US govt. set up free health care through IHS (Indian health services)
-they provided free care in exchange for mass quantities of land
-The IHS system is grossly under staffed and ill-equipped compared to the need
-school dropout rate is 70>#/p###
-teacher turnover rate is 800% higher than Nat’l average
-the homeless pop. is very high, but most families don’t turn people away
-33% of homes lack basic water, sewage, and electricity
-many homes on the reservation use the oven to heat the home
-39% of homes have no electricity
-there are limited or no basic services (banks, stores, eateries, libraries, buses etc.)
-alcoholism affects 4 out of 5 families on the reservation
-alcoholism related deaths are 300% higher that Nat’l average
Please don’t let the information overwhelm you. It should cause you to rise up out of your chair. It should guide your heart toward a solution. My hope is that it will fuel your desire for justice and redemption. The native women, the children, the elderly, and very few men have been holding things together because of their love for one another. They are growing very weak. Many of these problems are getting younger (suicide, diabetes, alcoholism). By no means should you think of the Native people as a lost cause. In fact they are doing some things better than the rest of the country is doing. There is little to no orphans on the reservation. Every child has a place to go. That is also the problem; many mothers or grandmothers are raising dozens of kids, many that are not of blood relation. Homelessness is also the same. Everyone has a home. The patience level of the average Native American is much higher than any group of people that I have seen. Many people on the reservation will give you clothes right off their back if they feel there is a need. My wife said to a lady “you have a beautiful necklace” and the lady took it right off her neck and gave it to her. This is an amazing quality many natives have. The world needs the beauty of the native heart. It is something few have seen and most have wondered. I love my native family so much and desire for them to know who they are in Christ. We can help!
Whatever breaks your heart or energizes you, don’t hesitate to start planning and let the Lord direct your steps. It is vital that we help each other. We can’t do this alone. Our world around us has lied to us saying that we need to be the Lone Ranger, self-reliant, that we need only ourselves. We have been lied to, we need each other. We need each other and we need it soon. Because if we don’t do it, who will? We have to have the idea that we are the “One”, because we are. Operating as a single unit fighting as with the strength of many should be our focus. We all have something to bring to the table, and it is vital to the success of this task. Use what God has given you because you are the only one that has that specific talent/gift and it is needed.
If you are unsure that you are a part of this table of conspiracy, consider the following thoughts that many may be having: “That sounds devastating; I hope someone will do something.” “That makes me so mad; I wish I could do something.” “If only I had anything to contribute, I would.” “God will do something, He has to.” “I know I’m supposed to do something but It seems impossible.” “I’ll keep that in my prayers.” “There has to be more people out there to help.” “When God tells me to do something I will.” You may have one or two more things to add to this list. The truth is I have had all these thoughts and more when I’m presented with a challenge of this magnitude. I have to believe that these people do exist, that I do have something to bring to the table, that God will do something, that I am mad and can do something, that I have something to contribute, that it is impossible with men but not with God, and that God has already spoken to us many times many ways.
Somewhere out there is a kid who is playing and imagining he is rescuing someone from something and it’s a knock down drag out battle. He is jumping around using weapons, running, chasing off evil, shouting and yelling for what he knows to be true. The adventure in this kid’s imagination is limitless and creative. He believes in that moment he is the one who is going to save the day. That kid was me. That kid was you. What happened to us? Warriors, it is time! Don’t hesitate any longer, you are needed. You are vital to the success of this mission. The lines are growing thin, the ground is being taken. The enemy does not rest, does not sleep. He will take everything that doesn’t have the Lords banner flying over it. Your support is enormous and you have been lied to. You are the one, chosen for such a time as this. The greatest battle this world has known. It is the hardest thing you will ever have to do. It isn’t for the weak. It’s for those who know their God and are known by God. Jesus is our only hope. He is our commander, our leader, the one who is… who was… and who will be again! He calls! The question is, are you willing to fight with everything you have? Whatever God has called you to do, do it. Whatever stirs your heart, listen to it and respond. Don’t let that childlike faith you once had, be snuffed out by lies from this world, from our enemy and even from those who would try to protect us. If you are being called, activate that faith and respond by getting involved with peoples’ pain. Those who will respond I believe will be chosen.
You have in some way affected me and I know that you are a part of this. I only ask that you do something. People are standing firm in hope that you will come. Some people believe that God has not forgotten about them. Some have given up and chose to extinguish the pain. Your presence builds the hope within people. Many have waited far too long. Send those reinforcements back to the front lines. It is the men who need to be fighting at the front. Women can help and have been helping. All are needed and all can do something whether you know it or not. Don’t let the enemy fool you to think it is harder than you can handle. Do you not know that you are the temple of God and the Spirit of God dwells in you? We think do, but Christ said Done! Live in such a way that reflects this truth. This letter is a call to those whom are invited to the table of conspiracy. I pray you make it to that table.

Congratulations on graduating One Heart Warriors’ Training Center. Couldn’t be more proud of this group! Thank you to everyone who came out to celebrate.







Celebrating the first day of summer with a 10K! Thanks to Aspinwall for the incredible prizes. Great looking T-shirts and Hats were awarded to the winners. Great job everyone!

#OneHeartWarriors #OHW #10k #Aspinwall #Run #Summer #FirstDayofSummer #Yay #Runners



Incredible day in Pryor. Billings Family Service donated palettes and palettes of food this afternoon. While we helped, it was really the Pryor High School Staff that received and distributed the load. They had such great attitudes even when it started pouring rain. Looking forward to being with y’all again!






Hey everyone! Please welcome the newest member to Team One Heart Warriors. We have hired Darci Rykowski to be our Community Relations Developer. She will help us grow our reach and connection within the Native communities. For those of you who missed hearing about this year’s Christmas Store in Pryor, let me tell you, it was a big win! Not only did we build better relationships with some of the leaders in Pryor, but we also served many families in the community with fun and exciting Christmas presents. Darci was the brains behind the operation and she did an excellent job organizing and fundraising for that particular event. In addition, she has also proven to be passionate about building bridges and honoring the Native cultures, while also providing the love and hope of Jesus in tangible ways.
Darci is hoping to grow her team of like-minded people who have a heart to develop stronger relationships with the Native communities across our state. If you would like to become involved in a more tangible way, she’s the person to contact at (406)690-7249 or by email at darcidrykowski@gmail.com.


The legend of “Tuff” has grown quite literally since the day Chester David Harris was born in Crow Agency, Montana in the winter of 1983. Harris’s father was of Crow and Cheyenne decent while his mother was Bulgarian; but, she had grown up on a reservation all her life. Tuff says, “My upbringing was great even if a little unusual, in that Crows and Cheyennes did not always get along and I was both.
Harris earned the nickname Tuff by beating the odds and surviving a bout with childhood pneumonia that nearly cost him his life as a newborn. By the time he was a fifth grader, he decided he would someday play in the NFL, a notion his peers scoffed, yet a vision Harris always kept close to his heart.
“My friends laughed at me and thought I was crazy,” Harris told the Glasgow Courier in 2010. “I was from the reservation. I couldn’t play in the NFL.”
And he did it. 5 years with a professional football career in the NFL – named “Team Player of the Year” multiple times.
Read Full Article Here: https://www.mtfootballhof.com/tuff-harris